Easy to Say, Hard to Do, and Sometimes Even Painful

So this week has been quite a tough one for me. Between feeling out of place, longing to be in africa, and trying to find contentment in where God has us right now, I feel like i'm in an emotional whirlwind. I'm trying to figure out how to deal with this period of waiting. I know the Lord led me to 2 Thes. 3:5 "May the lord lead your hearts to a full understanding and expression of the love of God and the patient endurance that comes from Christ." I am always praying that the Lord teach me to love the way He does and now I see that God's love and patient endurance, or as I would say, patiently waiting, go hand in hand. How long did the Lord patiently wait on me to give my life to Him? How much patience does He have with me as I make mistake after mistake? How often does He forgive as I continue to sin? His patience never ceases to amaze me and I know He promises to wait on us forever, for He will never leave us or forsake us. And then when I was feeling little contempt for the waiting process I came across a scripture that read something a little like "does the clay pot argue with its maker?" This actually makes me laugh just because I love how the Lord can put us right in our place when needed. So, I know we have put our lives in His hands and God is in control, molding, making and preparing us for the future. As Pastor Neilson (from Sweden) said last weekend at church, speaking on the story where Jesus calms the sea, Jesus said they were going to the other side! It doesn't matter what comes along in the process, it won't stop you, YOU ARE GOING! But at the same time, we must take and learn what God is giving us now, not waiting to live. What can I do with what is in my hand right now? Jen

We're Home

So we're home from Africa and I don't know where to begin. The trip was sooo exciting and yet so overwhelming (speaking for both of us) as we get home and begin to process what we've experienced. Our team was so great and I miss them all every time I think about the trip. Can you believe 30 people and not one argument or drama? That's a God thing in itself. I know we made some life long friendships. And I can not say enough about the people of Swaziland. They are so open and hungry for love, real love, Christ's love. I experienced so many emotions on this trip, and afterward, with the constant question going through my head of whether or not we may move to Africa in the future. God showed me I really just had to take it one day at a time and focus on the moment that God was giving us and the people He was having us encounter at that very time. I had to make this trip about others and not about myself. Isn't it amazing we can somehow make everything about ourselves? As we get back into the routine of our life, there is one thing I can walk away from this with for sure-- I just want to be closer to my father in heaven. I want to love people the way He loves people and I want to give of myself the way He gave His son. I want Him to teach me and my prayer is that He lead and guide us in all we do.